HEART? whats that… FEEL? I don’t know how too…

The months are quickly going by and it is starting to scare me how much older and quickly i am getting, my birthday is coming up in May and i am slowly making my way out of the early twenties. When you realize time is not working at your pace as a woman when you cannot help but start feeling really maternal.

You know when you were teen a lot of things did not really make much sense, most friendships and relationship did not really mean much and you had not valued them as much. In fact most times you did not even know what exactly were doing.  Than you transition into adulthood than things get real, you fall in love, heartbroken, break hearts, make a lot of mistakes, loose yourself, find yourself, build yourself and become a woman.

When you realize there is so much to a partnership you consider a lot of things, heck you even find strengths you really never had or thought you had. At this point just dating does not cut it, whomever you start talking too and consider having as a partner has to be in it for the long run. i mean sex is not just sex anymore now you want to make love. you don’t even mind going through a period of drought just to have the right person touch you.

i think falling in love is really more like finding your soul mate, somebody that just sinks into every part of you, a glove the perfect fit for your hand. not too tight or too loose. just the right fit.

well truth be told the road to this experience is hard, its even harder when you have had it and life just had to happen now you are left to re start that search.

its even sad now in our day and time where “love” is no longer what it was or should be.  How do you stay encouraged and patient in times like these?  a time where selling you soul is okay to do because its accepted, i mean why sell your soul when you have already given it to Christ when  you christened? a time where you are stuck in a situation where you have to make what you share with someone work because you have that stubborn feeling in you called HOPE. You are stuck in a situation with someone who you question loving even when it hurts so much (though it shouldn’t  when do you give up or draw the line in being hopeful? giving so much in what and who you believe in just to be called naive?

What does it really mean to want someone that has something to offer? or to be asked what you have to offer? is there a right answer to give to that question?  i mean when you get seriously involved in someone after all their physical attributes, don’t you than see their inside, their Morales  beliefs, strengths and weaknesses  do you believe in the vision they have or vice versa? do you believe and encourage them in achieving those visions? are you growing with them? are you able to let go of past hurtful experiences and indulge in what is good at the moment?  do they bring out the good in you? are you compatible? as in when one falls can the other be strong for the other? what  does it take to question your partners loyalty? which part of their past and present mistakes or even baggage are you willing to accept and pardon? do you value them enough to TRY 98% not to lie for the sake of trust? knowing people turn into monsters when pushed but is it a monster you are willing to have come out now and then? its scary because love drives so many intense feelings it may lead to a lot of unthinkable and unexplainable words or actions.

the spectrum of relationships/ marriage is so large its hard to speak to the masses, but in the end we are all fighting the same battle of happiness which in reality we can all achieve it really depends on what we are willing to sacrifice or go without. perhaps even how many times you are willing to try.

a lot of these things started playing out in my head when one of my closest friends got married last year, and when we speak now its on a different level which can get you  thinking.  through their own you learn and too experience valuable lessons not just about being compatible but growth too. the last thing you really want to do is try to grow with someone who is already grown. in all aspects of the word. At what point in life does a man truly know they have found their one? whats more what propels them to ask a woman’s hand in marriage?

when you see positive attempts you have to appreciate, it is very hard to succeed but love was never meant to be easy.

love hard but remember to love happy.

Taa Taa Janet









Just Because….

No fancy words or explanations here, but because i am special and because it’s another day lived.



Currently Jammin` too

Frou Frou is a British Band that i love listening too when i am in a state of  (clutter) e.g confusion, anxiety or just plain stressed out.

Thats how i deal with certain things taking too long to happen for my liking or just things i have no control over. Usually i clean, but since i still need to be productive at work i need something peaceful and soothing to calm me down and bring me back to earth.

You might recognise the beat of the song from Wiz Khalifa`s – In the cut

Enjoy Toodles


The longer I live, the more I realize the impact of attitude on life.

Attitude, to me, is more important than facts. It is more important than the past, than education, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness or skill. It will make or break a company… a church… a home.

The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day. We cannot change our past… we cannot change the fact that people will act in a certain way. We cannot change the inevitable. The only thing we can do is play on the one string we have, and that is our attitude… I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it.

And so it is with you… we are in charge of our attitudes.

Charles Swindoll


I woke up this morning ready to face the world knowing that my family and friends are all safe even though they are so far from me. I decided to check my twitter and noticed that my timeline was filled with tweets has-tagged MOVENAMIBIA. I kept reading trying to make sense of what this was all about, so i decided to ask one of my cousins what this topic was in referral too. She told me this was young ordinary Namibians making their voices heard on all the recent brutal events of passion killings and baby dumping in the country.

I think its a very thoughtful initiative to march on behalf of the voiceless, and to show sympathy with the effected families.

Browsing all the local newspapers it is quiet astonishing how much of “trend” passion killing and baby dumping has become. You cannot help but fear what is to come, you cannot help but question the sort of people your family members could be involved with, the place you grew up feeling safe and protected which has now turned into a place of ruthless behavior and brutality. The same place we all need to raise our children in one day we can no longer make it safe for them, a place where young mothers fear giving birth more than they fear certain illnesses.

I think its time government invested in helping young mothers with providing them with resources such as free pre-natal care classes, and sex education to help develop their mindset. Its not enough to say “we are building a future for our young leaders” which leaders are those when we have women fearful of indulging in something as beautiful as pregnancy and motherhood. Dumping a baby that is as good as murder! Our young men the pillars of our household acting like barbarians because they do not know how to deal with anger.

All this still boils down to the same fact Alcohol consumption, i think strict rules and regulations need to be put in place because a lot actions are vented through the unsober mind. Even in the Bible, it is stated that ‘wine is a mocker and beer a brawler, whoever is led astray by them is not wise’

“Although the country is already on fire, it is not too late to extinguish the flames. But we can only achieve this if we take into consideration that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge … but fools despise wisdom and discipline. A person who is not God-fearing is like a wild animal because he or she does not fear the consequences of his or her actions.

“It is for this reason that someone can kill two or three people at the same time without feeling guilty of anything. But still, we should vow to be slaves of hope that one day the situation will be brought under control.” says Retired bishop Kleopas Dumeni of ELCIN church on a recent interview with Informate Newspaper.

My question still remains, if these raged boyfriends and baby dumping mothers were actually imprisoned, what are they taught in our prisons? Do they sit and serve their time? or are they undergoing some sort of math or accounting course? My opinion would be to counsel until the sun turns green, these people based on whatever reason they are imprisoned for. Our country has too much talent and knowledge going to waste, all those graduates sitting at home without work opportunities. Anger management, what better place to teach on how to work on yourself than in a place where you have no freedom. Be it frustrating or not.

Some people find themselves in situations not really because they planned to be there but because sometimes there is just no other way out. So awareness is key. when you have the correct resources believe we will see change!

With that said happy hump day and lets #MOVENAMIBIA


Love Janet

Lady in Emerald

Just recently i  started to slowly but surely step out of my “black comfort zone” seriously i just have too many black clothes in my closet. Reason im usually so scared is because black is slimming and sometimes experimenting with bold colors can be quite tricky especially when you are trying to hide that flab that just wont go away.

i bought an emerald dress out of impulse, i saw the black one first and loved it but they did not have it in my size, so i had no choice but to take the last option, i wasn’t leaving the dress. its very flattering because it hugs the figure so well it perfects the hour glass illusion amazingly.

Medi Pencil Dress: Zara

Necklace/ Chocker: Aldo

Watch : Micheal Kors

Wallet (used as clucth) : Aldo

Shoes : Aldo

Throwback Thursday: Summer Gone to Soon

I had to post this, firstly because it was the last time i hung out with my girlfriends before they moved to a different province and also because i  just miss summer already. The weather is so gloomy you cant help but feel the same way. I don’t mind the cold all i want is sunshine too.